Watch Musings I: Five Types of Watches Every Collection Needs
Picking a watch is a lot like picking a career or a girlfriend. While there may be some objective tradeoffs we can account for, preferences are ultimately subjective. We like what we like at the end of the day. The neat thing about it is that our choices thus offer insight into our character.
That said though, there are some broad categories of watches that help make for a well-rounded collection. Here are five types of watches that ought to be part of every solid collection.
The Beater
Every collector needs at least one watch that they absolutely have zero worry about breaking or losing. It’s the watch you throw on when you need to help your brother move to a new apartment, work late in a sketchy part of town, battle a sadistic alien in a jungle, or challenge some Russian gangsters to a drinking contest. The Beater watch’s job is to protect all of the other watches. Therefore a good beater is either extremely durable, or extremely cheap and easy to replace. G-Shocks are a great option as they often fit both criteria.
Beater watches are the unsung heroes of any watch collection. We put the Beater through hell because he can take it. Because he’s the hero we deserve but not the one we need right now. He’s a watchful protector. A silent guardian. A Dark Knight.
::music swells::
The GADA (Go Anywhere Do Anything)
The GADA is often mistaken for a Beater, but it is not actually the same purpose. There is a lot of overlap though to be fair. Some GADA’s are also Beaters, but not all Beaters are also GADA’s, and vice versa.
A true “Go Anywhere Do Anything” watch is defined by its versatility, not its durability. The whole point of a GADA is that you don’t have to think about it. It’s the watch that somehow mystically adapts to whatever you’re wearing, be it a suit, tuxedo, shorts, pirate costume, and everything in between. The GADA is the watch you grab when you’re in a rush and just want to throw something on that you know will be fine. A really good GADA should be capable of serving as a Beater, at least occasionally (the term ‘GADA’ sort of implies it should be able to do this…) but some prefer to keep those use cases distinct. To each their own.
The Crowd Favorite
A well rounded collection should have at least one piece that the Reddit crowd can get behind. This will help you to properly integrate into new online watch communities as people are able to find at least one shitter in your low res SotC photo that they don’t hate. You know the names: Speedy, Snowflake, Duro, G-Shock, Vostock, Skx007, Bambino, BB58, Seiko 5, Weekender, Reverso, Hulk — all watches guaranteed to get those upvotes and signal your awareness that we live in a society.
The Just-For-Me
This one is the exact opposite of the last one and it is a tragedy how many collectors never manage to find themselves a piece like this. The “Just For Me” is the misunderstood timepiece — the ugly duckling. It’s a watch you never see anyone else wear and never see posted on /r/watches. It could be a microbrand, a DIY mod job, an unpopular variation of a well known release, an obscure vintage item, a family heirloom, or just a random mall shitter that caught your eye. Whatever it is, it occupies a special place in your heart. Other folks don’t get it. They’ve either never heard of it or if they have, they don’t like it. But you do. And that’s what counts in this dumb little hobby. We ought to collect things we love, not just status signals, investments, and Instagram flexes.
The Flex
Speaking of flexes, a good watch collection should have at least one. The key thing to keep in mind though is that a flex watch doesn’t have to be expensive. It isn’t necessarily about flexing wealth. The flex watch’s goal is simply to stand out — to get attention. It could be something wildly colorful, or big, or a bit noisy, or just weird in some way. Diamonds and gold of course work great too. The flex watch is the one you put on when you need to make a statement of some kind without saying a word. 99% of the time no one will ever give a shit about your watch. The flex is for that other 1%.
